Cover of Darkness
I clung to the railing examining the stairs. They were just about as old as the house. Jessie turned around briefly to smile at me and say, “If you so frightened up there, come down here.” He held out his hand to me as if it were an incentive. I shook my head in response. I had my suspicions about my basement. Let alone go downstairs in the dark with him. He was known for putting splinters in a girls personal boundaries or playing awful pranks on them. Other girls warned me about this flaw. Although I never seem to run into them anymore, they were so odd. I remember this one particular girl, Maya. She always told me, ‘be careful. He likes to use the cover of darkness to play his little tricks.’ I’ll never forget that or her. Rest her soul.
“Right! You won’t come down because you think it’s haunted!” Jessie cried out laughing, taking his hand back and shrugging.
“I do not!” I yelled back. It was a lie. I did think that it was haunted, more than haunted actually. “Plus! You shouldn’t be making fun of me Jessie. I’m the one who’s being the good neighbor and lending you things!” I wailed.
“True!” He chuckled. His voice echoed off the cement walls of the basement.
“Just grab the extra sleeping bag, okay? It should be to your right somewhere.” I tried to peer further into the darkness, but only the darkness of the basement looked back. “So you said you were going camping?” I hollered down. “It’s nice that you’re going with your brother. I’m sorry I can only lend you one sleeping bag!” I paused to listen for a reply; He must have not heard me. His heavy footsteps soften the further away he got.
I reminded myself; you’re almost an adult. There’s no reason to be scared of the dark or him. The air seemed to grow dense and cold upstairs, I shivered trying to ignore the fear creeping into my mind. “Is your flashlight working?” I called out again. I was starting to feel nervous and rambled on some more, “I would have opened a window or door downstairs if I could have, to let some light in, you know. But there’s none.” I laughed. “You know it’s funny story. Supposedly my basement used to be an underground holding cell way back. It’s pretty cool.” I nodded as if he could see me. Still nothing.
I heard someone clear their throat and I called out for Jessie again, shifting my weight from foot to foot. There was no answer. “Jess, was that you? Everything okay down there?” I called out again, swearing under my breath. If he thinks that he’s going to get me down there by scaring me, he better think again. I whipped around peering at my surroundings. No one’s there, you’re being silly Adrianna. I told myself. I’m sure you could smell panic roll off of me in groups of four. If Jessie wasn’t going to answer me, that was just fine. I’d preferred silence anyways. I glanced back to the basement forcing myself to make out the shadows. I could see a few boxes and old Christmas decorations that still lingered about. I jumped when I felt a light, brisk tap on my shoulder. When I turned back around I saw a familiar face. It was Jessie with his shaggy hair and brown eyes. He looked strung out and excited. His eyes gleamed with the darkness of his tricks as he laughed. My instinct told me to run, but it was quickly rationalized by my inner voice. He was just playing games. I told myself. I was just about to open my mouth to ask how’d he got up here so fast, when he held up his hand to silence me.
“You are right Adrianna.” He spoke, “It is haunted.”
Written by: Alecia Writes
Side Note: I would love to hear your feedback on this story, and I am open to kind constructive criticism.
8 thoughts on “Cover of Darkness”
I really like this, a nice sense of atmosphere and tension building, I would like to see what happens next..
I loved your story and would want to read what follows. It has the right amount of mystery. However, I think it needs editing. It has many typos like ‘ your being silly Adrianna’ instead of ‘you’re being silly Adrianna’.
Keep writing. Hope you had a great day. 🙂
Thank-you! I do have to work on my editing.
I hope you have a great day as well! 🙂
It’s a very curious story, but it does need a bit of editing. It really detracts from the writing. It’s hard to edit your own work, though, because your brain subconsciously supplies what is supposed to be there instead of what actually is there. There’s a good deal of suspense that builds through the story too, which is impressive, considering it’d have to be under 1000 words. I look forward to reading more of your work. 🙂
Thank-you! I do have to work on my editing. Your words mean a lot. 🙂
I agree with the earlier comments that you’ve created a nice tension between the characters, and have built a story that leaves the reader wanting more.
The line ‘I did think that it was haunted, more the haunted actually.’ – shouldn’t that be ‘more than haunted’?
It should be! Thanks for pointing that out! Editing is not my strong suit.
Have a great day! 🙂
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